do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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