Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
