you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize