just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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