I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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