If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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