Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
