I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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