So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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