yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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