I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
