this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Randomize
