honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
