Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
