This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize