so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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