Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Is it because I queefed?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
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I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
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Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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