Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
