He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
dude. I can hear the air.
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