It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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