I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize