Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize