pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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