why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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