i permit you to call me
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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