Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
