your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
