Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
