3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
