I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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