The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
