Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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