O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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