Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
