Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
