$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
