Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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