I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
