ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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