I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
