he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
