But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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