..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.