your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
