Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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