I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
