wakey wakey hands off snakey
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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