Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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