just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize
