why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
